I was at my parents’ place as usual that morning…and I was doing some editing work at the table when I spotted some of these…

Cotton buds 1

…so I took one and started twiddling it in the outer part of my ear. Imagine my horror when I found that I only had the stick in my hand! Good grief! The tip must have fallen into my ear!!!

I quickly called the maid to have a look but she said there was nothing inside. We searched all over the floor and there too, we found nothing! Then, I called my father who was already out on his daily rounds in town by then…and he took me to his regular barber. The man saw nothing in my ear…so he just did a bit of cleaning for me and that was it!

Now, just where had that darn thing disappeared to?

Cotton buds 2

Later in the afternoon, I was thinking that perhaps I should go and see a doctor…and off I went before 4.00 pm to the specialist in town. The girl at the reception counter said that he had gone out but she would call him…so I waited…and waited…and waited. It was definitely past 4.30 when I gave up and told the girl that I had changed my mind. So, I went home, the mystery still unsolved.

I did not feel anything, no pain…no discomfort but after a session of karaoke singing the following afternoon, I thought that one ear felt different from the other ear. So, after dinner that evening, I went back to see the doctor with my missus tagging along. Once again, he wasn’t there and they had to phone him but after a not-too-long-a-wait, he came.

I told him that I was cleaning the outer ear and it fell in…

Cotton bud 3

and he retorted, “If you were cleaning the outer ear, the thing would NOT fall in!” Wait a minute…I was about to respond to that but in the end, I refrained from doing anything of the sort considering that I would be at his mercy once he started poking things in me…I mean, in my ear! LOL!!! After all, he’s the wise and learned one – he’s a doctor!

He made me sit on a special chair and used an instrument to check my other ear. I could see the image on the television screen above my head. It was nice and clean! Of course it was! And I guess that would go into my bill too, doctor?

Then he checked THE ear…and lo and behold! There was NO cotton bud inside!!! See, doctor, I wanted to say to him! I TOLD you I was cleaning the outer ear! So the cotton bud did not fall inside after all! But there were two bits of hair inside, so he remarked, “Nope! No cotton bud inside…but you succeeded in pushing some hair into your ear.”

It just crossed my mind then that normally we do not have hair in our ears the same way we have it in our nostrils though I have seen people with hair growing out of their ears…, I think. So I asked the doctor, “Where did the hair come from?” And indicating with his instrument, he said, “Here!!!”  I could see on the television screen that he was pointing it at the hair on my head. Hah!!! I didn’t say anything more after that! After all, he’s the wise and learned one – he’s a doctor! Hahahahahaha!!! I made no mention whatsoever that I had been to see a barber who could have got the bits of hair into my ear. What he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him! LOL!!!

Then he took another instrument and started sucking everything out of my ear – the hair and God knows what else. The noise sounded like I was having liposuction at that point in time, but unfortunately, no! Sigh! I could have been slimmer after that! Hahahahaha!!! And that was it!

So, there was NO cotton bud in my ear and for that peace of mind, I had to fork out RM30. In fact, I thought that was pretty cheap…as I heard that specialists would usually charge no less than RM50 for consultation fee alone before cashing in on everything else! Perhaps, I was given some special concession as he and my missus were both in the same field. Whatever it is, thanks, doc! Now at least, I can be sure that there’s no cotton bud in my ear.

But the mystery remains… Now, just where has that darn cotton bud disappeared to?