Obvious…

I was at a coffee shop enjoying a bowl of mouth-watering kam pua when somebody came up to me and said, “Chiak mee ah?” (Eating noodles?) Now how was I supposed to respond? No, I’m keeping it all in my mouth, so when I get home, I can spit it all out to feed my kids!!!

Or I was sitting in the cineplex waiting for the movie to start. Then somebody walked in and he asked, “Khua hee kah?” (Watch movie kah?) No, my wife threw me out of the house, so I’ve no place to have a nap!!!

Now why on earth do people have to ask the obvious? These are just two instances…but if you think about it, it happens all the time.  You’re up to your neck in work at the office and they ask you, “Busy?”  You’ve just got home and your neighbour asks, “Just got home kah?” Grrrrr……

If there has to be such small talk as an indication of friendliness, they should at least come up with something that is not a mere statement of the obvious.

And don’t you hate it when somebody phones you at home and asks, “Chee leh si lang air choo hio?” (Is this somebody’s house?) I guess what they want to know is whether they’ve called up somebody’s residence and not an office, but I am always tempted to reply, “No, this is somebody. I’m sorry my house can’t talk!”

Or they’ll ask you, “Where is this?” Many a time have I responded, “Now YOU tell me! You made the call and you don’t know where this is???” And once there was this poor fella who called and asked, “Kopi Tiam hia?” (Is this a coffee shop?) I was tempted to say, “No, this is a coffin shop. How many do you want?” However, I refrained from doing so and quietly replied, “Yes, what would you like?” He promptly placed his orders and hung up;I smiled with glee at the thought of that presumptious nincompoop cursing and swearing at some poor coffee shop people once his patience started to wear out.

Oops…I’ve digressed, but never mind. Anyone has anything like that to share?